Monday, January 6, 2014

I have set my hand to the plough and I will never look back.........

Dear Mother. How you seem to, every week, answer my prayers, is beyond me but at the same time, I am not surprised at all. I love you mom. Dad and Bubba... okay... so what's the whole thing on the thug ties? ha ha.

 Have you all gotten my Christmas package yet? And mom... I still have not gotten that other package yet. BUT I did get my hair package... I don't want to say this but the other package might have gotten lost.... I was on splits up in Gwanju this week at apparently there are many missionaries who have not gotten their packages yet:( Like one sister never even got her Christmas package.. her mother just cried over skype... So I will let you know when I get it... but it might not get here... I will let you know. But I got the other one:)

So... Diondra committed me to ask every one I talked with to get baptized. All ready to do that and then... none of our 8 investigators could meet and they ALL;.... literally all... might not want to meet again... So this week was... a... bit...rough..... But like, still when life hits bottom the Master gives you a hand to lift you up. Though all of our investigators either dropped us or couldn't meet, we still saw so many miracles!!!!!!!
1: So... like... apparently God loves me and he helps me out... a lot... like... God is so merciful. So you know how I had the whole passport problem...well I finally got it and went to go re-new it and they said if I was 4 days later..... they would have to send me back to America.... ha ha ha. Oh the adventures of Sister Ensign. I called President and he was speechless... and I said "President I'm only going home early if I'm in hand cuffs so I better get this done so I don't embarrass the ensign name." He laughed and gave me permission to hop a train and get to Gwanju to figure everything out. ha ha ha. So that was so nice of God to help me get  my passport figured out quickly. 

2: on our way home from Gwanju I was frustrated that our investigators were being ... frustrating and so on the bus I just said a quick prayer and asked God to just help me do his work. Help me to just do what he would want me to do. So all the sudden I am talking to these college students on the bus when this American grandpa gets on the bus. ... I have not seen an American grandpa in a year... so that was surprising. But for some reason I was totally wrapped up in him. I didn't know if he even spoke English. So I continued to talk to the girls and gave them a flyer and then noticed he was getting off the bus. I quickly told sister Scott "lets follow him". Creepy right. ha ha ha. Anyways. we get off the bus quickly and he turns around and totally starts talking to us like he is so glad we got off the bus. Come to find out His name is Mark, he is from Cali, He LOVES UT and has even been to temple square. He loves the church and the people it produces. He said in Cali he owned a record store and he only had one employee he could trust... that employee was a Mormon. Apparently they talked a lot about he church and Mark was really interested and he was SO thankful to meet us. He said he wanted to meet again. AND he said he knew LOUISA!!!! Now  I feel like I finally know why we met Louisa. Other than to help her. She is going to help us get to Mark. We will be meeting Mark this Saturday:)

3: yesterday at church we were sitting there really sad that not only could our investigators not come to church, but we couldn't even ask them to come to church because they couldn't meet and they wouldn't answer their phones, and they were not home when we visited.... or maybe they just didn't answer the door. Well anyways.. we decided to be happy anyways:) And we were sitting there when the LA we have been trying to work with comes in with her non member friend:) ha ha ha ha. So trying not to scream of excitement we just chill out and take the bread and water:) So of COURSE we go to young women's with them and the amazing young president being so smart and following the spirit asked us missionaries to share our testimonies:) Both me and sister Scott were so impressed to talk about "personal progress". The spirit was ON FIRE!!!!!!!! It was so great. I shared my testimony that it was through this book that I was interested in reading my scriptures every day. writing in my journal. doing service, etc. I read how when Chelsea was sick in bed how I went to her room, found her scriptures and personal  progress book and how they were USED and how I know my sweet angle Chelsea had studied hard and knew her stuff. Like so many other times, I wanted to be like my angel Chelsea. Well I shared that and the spirit was there. SO strong. I was so thankful to be blessed with the opportunity to teach. I have been trying SO hard to teach lately with out teaching investigators we teach every one we can:) So then this room of 5 young women share their testimonies and even this non Mormon got up and said, "I liked eating the bread and water". We asked if we could meet again but because she does not live in Mokpo she said she could not meet again. But I know that whenever she comes to Mokpo again, she will come to church:):) 

4: I was a little... depressed yesterday after we talked with our investigators and non are interested in meeting with us really and Dave and Honey AND sister Pack cant meet anymore. So I was a little sad yesterday. But I said a little prayer again that I would just do what the Lord wanted me to do. I don't care what he wants me to do. I'll do it. So we had our plans and back up plans fail and so we went to our 3rd back up plan (which we do a lot lately) and we decided to talk walk home from the train station and talk to people. I decided randomly  aka the spirit to try giving Book of Mormons to these drunk men we met a few weeks ago in a fisher mans shop:) well I was worried to go in, afraid they would just be drunk again and we would just be the cute American girls again. But I felt impressed to go give them the blue books. So we walk in and they were not there. Though there were other people there... so... looking like idiots we walk around and luckily they had this cute puppy I was playing with and then this random guy said in Korean "your the Mormon missionaries". Umm... your right. ha ha ha. This man then explains with excitement that he use to meet the man missionaries:) we talked with him and he said he was really interested in meeting again. WELL then music to my ears. I said, holding the book out, "Do you have the book of Mormon?". He then just said "Can I please have that book?". Music to my ears and a warm touch to my broken heart. Its amazing that as a missionary who wishes SO badly to see the miracle of baptism, and doesn't, has a broken heart, how just by hearing someone say "Can I please have that book?" completely restores my faith and keeps me going.

Luckily my faith and my drive have not been broken down, but my heart has. Christ when he visited America and told the nephite disciple's that they would live forever and be with held from physical death, sickness, etc. But he said he would not with hold the sorrow of the world. That they would still feel sorrow. I feel like it is what I feel at times. Though I have the faith, health and vigor to keep going like the working horse, I do have sorrow for the sins of the people I love. I have been talking about this a lot with my mission president. What a sweet man. And he keeps telling me "don't give up". I was so happy to boldly say "President,  Ensigns don't give up." And either do disciples. and I am both of those things. ha ha. I am truly comfortable in the fact that I am doing the Lords work. That's all I'm here to do. God wants baptisms as bad as I do. In fact, he wants them more. And I know I am doing his work. I report to the Lord. I know he knows my effort and actions and he is there with me in the sorrow. But we rejoice. I am happy. I am happy because I am on the Lords errands. Though I desired to keep Diondras commitment and didn't have anyone to ask (investigator wise), I know that I did the Lords work. That's all we are here to do. I'm here to baptize. And I will do that if it is in Gods will and in the investigators agency. It will happen. :) I just need to keep the faith. And don't worry, I wont ever give up. "I have set my hand to the plough and I will never look back". This week was a good week. Transfer calls are next week. I have no idea. I'll let you know where I am for my last two transfers. I love you to the moon and back.

Sister Nicolle Ensign

BUBBA YOU ARE FILLING OUT YOUR MISSION PAPERS. !!!!!!!*!&@#^$&@#*@*#&@*#&@@(*#$*$()*#$()&#)(%&*@#()$*@ I'm FREAKING OUT!!!! LOVE YOU !!! GO GET E'M BUBBA!!!!!!! LOVE YOU . LOVE YOU MOM. LOVE YOU SAM. LOVE YOU DAD.

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